i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
bring money and cleavage
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize
