i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
You asked me to text you at 11 and remind you that he's 33. It's 11:20. He's 33.
you're too late. he has eggnog and whiskey and all seven seasons of buffy. I shan't be coming home tonight
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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