i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
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