the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
Randomize
