Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize
