I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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