My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
i just google imaged poop.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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