Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Randomize
