he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Randomize