she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
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