I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
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