Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Randomize