if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
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