It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
I queefed so loud it echoed.
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
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