Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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