if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
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