Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
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