Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Randomize