we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
