covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
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