Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
Randomize
