Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
We just shotgunned beers for America
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Randomize
