SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
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