It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Randomize
