smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Randomize
