He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
I will pee on everything he values.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
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