I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
