i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
Randomize
