I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Randomize
