I look better un-naked...
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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