PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 ðŸžðŸ·
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
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