I asked a girl to buy her a drink, she had I have a boyfriend, so I said, well i have a goldfish, she said what? I replied, oh I'm sorry I thought we were talking about shit that doesnt matter.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
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