id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
Too much gin, very little bucket
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
