Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
Drake has all the answers
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
Randomize