but the lizard people decide everything anyway
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
