He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
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