Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
It was his birthday this weekend. I had to carry him 6 blocks, in 3 inch heels. The entire time he was trying to molest me, eat my face, and try to stop every two feet to tie his shoe. He would light a cigarette, forget about it, almost burn everyone, throw it out, then decide he wanted to smoke. He kept repeating that he trusts me with his life.
...Wow...
I could be a kindergarten teacher
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
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