I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
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