i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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