I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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