I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
