guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize
