Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Randomize
