She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Randomize
