I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
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