quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
Randomize
