I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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