She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
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