hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize
