I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
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