It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
Randomize
