I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
Randomize
