It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
